


The Mark Of A Soulmate - Wolfstar

by Candaice_Lace_Bright



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, M/M, Romantic Soulmates, Sirius Black hiding his soulmark, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, lily and james finally getting together, remus and sirius being super cute, remus pretending to be unworthy of a soulmate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-17 00:13:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29833065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Candaice_Lace_Bright/pseuds/Candaice_Lace_Bright
Summary: Remus doesn't want to be disappointed on his 15th birthday if he doesn't get a soul mark because of his lycanthropy, so he covers his wrist up and pretends he doesn't have a soulmate. Sirius has a soulmate, somewhere. He just wished it was Remus.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 1
Kudos: 82





	The Mark Of A Soulmate - Wolfstar

**Author's Note:**

> Please don't repost anywhere without permission. Thanks! :)

A paw print. That's what showed up on Sirius' arm on his fifteenth birthday. He supposed he wasn't very shocked at the little image; it did represent him. He wondered who owned the matching symbol, and he hoped and prayed that they were someone who would love him, even for his fucked up family and traumatic past.

The night before Remus' fifteenth birthday, he put a glamour on his arm. He wasn't sure that a soulmate mark would even appear for him since he wasn't entirely human anymore. He didn't want to be disappointed when he woke up, so he just never looked. He decided that if he ignored it, it would never bring him any pain. The problem: It would never bring him any joy either.

The following morning when everyone berated him, asking what his soulmark looked like, he simply said, "I don't have one; I'm not human." And Remus actually convinced himself that he saw Sirius' face drop at that sentence. But he was just imagining things, right?

* * * *

Sirius had never found his soulmate, but he sure as hell tried. For the first year after receiving his oh-so-lovely mark, he searched endlessly for someone who had a matching one. He failed miserably and still hadn't found them, even by his sixteenth birthday.

"They're probably a muggle," James had told him every time he complained about not finding his soulmate. James was lucky; on his fifteenth birthday, he woke up with a lily flower as his tattoo. It didn't take him long to track down the girl whose name matched the tattoo and inspect her wrist. He'd been dating her ever since, but they took things surprisingly slowly, and the whole situation made James act a hell of a lot more mature towards Lily.

"I just wish I could find them."

"At least you have one," Remus muttered and then felt guilty because maybe he did have one, and he was just too scared to find out, "Nevermind, look, Sirius, they will show up when the time is right. You just have to be patient."

"I'm sorry you don't have one, Moony," Sirius said with a small smile.

"Who'd want to be with a werewolf anyway?" Remus replied before closing his book and walking upstairs to their dorm.

"Me," Sirius mumbled before standing up and following the sandy-haired boy upstairs.

* * * *

Sirius was sitting in his potions class when he had a revelation. The sudden idea caused him to jump in his seat and knock over a vile of something. It began smoking, but Sirius didn't really mind. He just pointed his wand at it and muttered a spell that cleaned it up before going back to his thoughts.

That night, Sirius came running into the dorm room, "Moony!" Remus just looked up at him with a confused expression, "You might have a soulmate," He told the boy.

Remus closed his book and moved over on the couch so an out-of-breath Sirius Black could sit down. "What do you mean?" He asked.

"I mean, that you had a soulmate before you were turned, so you still have one now."

"That's not how it-"

"Yes, it is! You are too good to not have someone to be with."

"Well, I suppose I'm designed to be alone because that's not how it works."

"You have to have a soulmate," Sirius told him.

"No, I don't."

"But you deserve it."

"No, I don't."

"Why not?" Sirius asked with an annoyed look, "You are worthy of having someone love you. Hell, you do have people who love you."

"I'm a monster."

"You're a werewolf, boo hoo."

"I hurt things."

"You hurt yourself, that's it. You're not hurting anyone else, and you aren't a bloody monster. You're Remus, beautiful and intelligent Moony."

"I'm not-" But Sirius covered Remus' mouth with his hand.

"This is part of the problem. You don't believe you're worth it, and it's making it impossible for me because I know you are worth it" Sirius removed his hand, "You are going to find your soulmate."

"I don't want to ruin their lives with my...problem."

"For Merlin's sake, stop calling yourself a problem, because you're not."

"How am I supposed to find them if I don't have a mark?"

"How about we make a deal?"

"..Okay?"

"If I don't find my soulmate by the end of this year, you and I will be soulmates."

"What?" Remus asked with a laugh, not that he was against it or anything.

"I mean, I had a similar agreement with James until he found Lily. We agreed that if we turned thirty and were still not married, we would just marry each other"

"But James is straight."

"Yeah, but he didn't want to be alone."

"I don't want you to give up your soulmate for me" Sirius looked down at his wrist, which was covered - as per usual. He had never shown his friends what his tattoo was because he didn't want them showcasing it or anything. He had a feeling that James would make a big scene and tell everyone what it was, and that would only end up with lines of girls with fake paw print tattoos on their wrists, begging to be his soulmate.

"Eh, soulmates are overrated anyway."

"And that's why you complain about never finding yours every day," Remus replied with a raised eyebrow.

"I really wouldn't mind you being my soulmate Remus," Sirius told him sincerely, "We'd have loads of fun" Sirius leaned back and smiled, "Always having a chaotic but lively home. There would be a whole room for your gigantic book collection, and I could have a room just for my music stuff" Sirius laughed, "We could have James and Lily over all the time, and there would always be hot tea because Merlin knows you're always drinking it" Remus smiled and set his cup down with a blush. "We could have a little dog."

"-And name him Snuffles" Remus joined in. Sirius just smacked him but then nodded a bit.

"Yeah, I suppose we could."

"You really think someone out there is destined to be with me?" Remus asked him in a quiet and insecure voice. Sirius leaned his head on Remus' shoulder.

"If anyone deserves someone to love them unconditionally, it's you."

* * * *

That night when everyone went to bed, Remus stayed up and stared at the ceiling. He kept rubbing his wrist and thinking. Maybe he was worth loving. Perhaps he did have a soulmate. Remus looked at his bare wrist. All he had to do was a flick of his wand and a little incantation, and all would be revealed.

He rolled over and grabbed his wand before holding it up to his wrist. Just do it, he told himself, but he couldn't because the unknown was far scarier than the gray fog of ignorance.

Remus fell back on his pillow and wondered what it would be like to have Sirius as his soulmate. He found himself actually wishing they were soulmates because then he could just randomly go up to Sirius and kiss him or hold him, and there would be nothing wrong with it. But every time he thought of anything past platonic in relationship to Sirius Black, he was reminded that someone out there - someone else - was looking for Sirus, and their souls were intertwined. Their magic was connected, and their hearts were forever bound.

On the one hand, Remus wished that Sirius didn't have a mark either so that they could consider their lack of symbols to be marks. But on another - much stronger side - he was glad that Sirius had a real soulmate because he deserved all the love in the world. Remus just wished he was the one destined to give it to him.

Sirius lay awake at night looking at his stupid mark. He hated that it reminded him of Remus so much. It could be a dog's print or a werewolf's print, depending on how you looked at it, and no matter how much he tried to convince himself it was a dog, like his animagus, he wanted to see a wolf print; so he did.

Sirius thought about who his soulmate could be. He would hope it was a boy, maybe with light brown hair and warm eyes, someone who had a sense of humor but wasn't as chaotic as him and James. He wanted someone who could balance out his crazy but also not be a stick in the mud. He wanted a boy who was caring, kind, compassionate, smart, lively, and warm. He wanted someone who was his best friend and his lover at the same time. He wanted Remus Lupin.

So that night, Sirius decided he was done looking for his soulmate. He decided that he would rather have Remus than anyone else, so what was the point in looking? All he had to do was wait until the end of the year and then claim Remus as his. He just wished that he could prove to Remus that he was worth the love and that it didn't matter who it was from. Because his soulmate isn't the only person who is allowed to love him unconditionally; Sirus already did.

* * * *

"Is he okay?" Sirius asked Madam Pomfrey the morning after a particularly bad full moon.

"He'll be fine, Mr. Black," She reassured him, "But please let me finish my scans." Pomfrey had always noticed something odd about Remus' scans, but it wasn't something that popped out as wrong, so she never really looked into it. However, this time, she felt obligated to check to make sure it wasn't anything terrible. She discovered it was a bit of magic surrounding his right wrist.

She immediately jumped to the conclusion that it had something to do with his soulmate mark, so she picked up his hand and checked his wrist but found nothing.

"Odd," She muttered to herself.

"What wrong?" Sirius came barging through the curtain to see him, "Is he okay?" When she didn't respond, Sirius got worried, "He's not dead, right?" He grabbed his other hand and found a pulse before sighing in relief.

"No, Mr. Lupin is not dead," She said sternly, "And you are not very good at following simple instructions. Like staying away while I finish checking on him"

"What's wrong with him?" He asked, ignoring her comment.

"Something with his wrist. There's magic around it, but there's no mark."

"He doesn't have a mark," Sirius told her, "He thinks that being part werewolf eliminated his chances of receiving a soulmark."

"That's not how it works," She told him.

"What?" Sirius asked, dumbfounded, "You mean Remus has a soulmate?"

"And a soulmark too," She assured him, "I've never known someone with lycanthropy who didn't have a soulmark."

"Then where is his?"

"That's what I'm wondering about" She quickly did a scan on what kind of magic was surrounding his wrist, "Glamour?" She mumbled confusedly.

"What?" Sirius became more confused every time that woman spoke.

"It seems as if Mr. Lupin has put a glamour on his wrist. And it shows here that it's been on for well over a year. Before his fifteenth even."

"Can you take it off?"

"Of course I can" She then mumbled a spell, and the tanned skin on Remus' arm sparkled a bit before little black splotches began appearing. They looked like ink blotches for a second, and then the image became clear, "Well, that's a rather fitting mark," She said with a laugh, but Sirius was walking backward, "Mr. Black?" Sirius kept walking before turning around and sprinting out of the room.

* * * *

Remus woke up to his whole body feeling a little achy and sore. He groaned when he rolled over, expecting to see Sirius, who had never missed a morning after his transformation in his entirety of knowing Remus' secret. But Sirius Black was nowhere to be seen, and his usual pile of chocolates severely lacked it's Sirius touch.

"Oh good, you're awake" Madam Pomfrey came walking into the room with a smile.

"Where's Sirius?" Remus immediately asked.

"Mr. Black was here earlier, but he left. Said he was going to get some air."

"How long ago?"

"A few hours?" She came to his side.

"Can I leave?"

"Not until you let me talk to you."

"Yes, I know this was a bad night, but I've had worse. I'll be more careful next time."

"This isn't about your transformations, dear. And we both know you can't change the way the wolf behaves."

"Oh," Remus turned to her, "Then what is it?"

"I found some...magic on you earlier, and after looking into it, I found you had a glamour on your wrist" Remus sucked in air and then looked up at the ceiling, "Your soulmark was covered. I'm not sure if someone else did this to you, or if you did, but-"

"Wait, I have one?" He looked down at his wrist, and there it was- black marks in the shape of a little paw print. He broke out into a smile and almost cried at the sight. He wasn't alone.

"Mr. Black was here when I discovered it-"

"-He saw?"

"Yes"

"Shit"

"Language"

"Sorry"

* * * *

Sirius sat on the Astronomy tower, smoking a cigarette and looking out at the stars. He hadn't stayed long enough to see what the ink developed into before he ran out of the hospital wing. As soon as he had made it to the tower, his whole world came crashing down. Remus Lupin had a soulmate. A real person who was connected with him in the most genuine and intense way possible. A person who wasn't Sirius.

Sirius wanted to feel happy for his friend. He wanted to congratulate him and help him find that special person, but he also ached for that special person to be him. Sirius stood up and leaned against the wall before putting out his cigarette and chucking it off the edge. He watched it fall towards the ground before rebounding on a shimmering field that kept people from intentionally or accidentally falling out of the tower. Sirius wondered what it felt like to hit that kind of magic. People always said it felt like falling flat into cement but also feeling the most relieving and intense happiness ever, all at the same time. It was like being on the edge of oblivion and then coming back all at once.

There was an odd shuffling sound behind Sirius, and he quickly turned around with his wand out, only to be met by a soft pair of amber eyes.

"Hey Moony," Sirius said with a sad smile. He put his wand back and turned towards the stars again, "Congratulations, by the way. I told you, you had a soulmate."

Remus was breathing quickly and wasn't sure what he had come up there to say. He knew Sirius went to the Astronomy tower whenever he needed air, so naturally, that's where Remus checked first. He was fortunate that the raven-haired boy was up there because his aching body was not happy with him running up all those stairs.

Remus wasn't sure what to say; he had so many thoughts running miles in his head. On the one hand, he was dying to just talk to Sirius; on another, he wanted to check Sirius' tattoo, and on the final, he just wanted to kiss the damn boy.

"I'm in love with you," Remus blurted out, and the simple sentence surprised him. He hadn't expected himself to say those words at all, and suddenly he was nervous.

"What?" Sirius asked incredulously. He was clearly hearing things.

"I-I'm in love with you," Remus said again in a softer voice - far less demanding than the previous time he had said it.

This time, Sirius turned around and looked at the blushing boy, "What?"

"I'm not going to say it again," Remus said with a little shy laugh.

"What about your soulmate?" Sirius asked while looking down at his own wrist. He tugged his sleeve to cover the ink.

"I have my entire life for them. Plus, I would rather have you."

"But you've wanted to have a soulmate since forever. Why would you just give up on that as soon as you have it?" Sirius looked to him, and all Remus saw was vulnerability. Remus took a step closer to Sirius.

"You wanted me before I had a mark," Remus replied, "At least, I think you did" Remus rubbed the back of his neck, "This whole thing is going to be a little awkward if you don't actually like me that way." Sirius just laughed and shook his head.

"Just kiss me, you idiot," Sirius told him, and Remus didn't need any other assurance before closing the space between them and pressing their lips together.

It began soft and unsure. Both of them were too nervous to reach out and touch the other, and they didn't move their lips much. It was as innocent as it was soft.

Remus pulled away with an awkward look.

"You call that a kiss?" Sirius asked with a snarky attitude.

"Oh, you little gi-" Sirius grabbed Remus' face and pulled their lips together once again. This time they both reached forward and met in the middle. Sirius was holding Remus' face like it was the most precious thing in the universe, and to Sirius, it was. Remus rested his hands on Sirius' waist and found himself slipping his hand up Sirius' shirt and running his fingers over the boy's warm and defined skin.

Every space that Remus touched sent a million little sparks across Sirius' skin and shivers down his spine. Remus pulled Sirius' belt loop and guided him against the stone wall, and when Remus put his hands on Sirius' thighs, Sirius got the memo and jumped up.

It could have been days that the two of them were pressed against each other - both of them too caught up in the magic of the moment to track the time. When they finally pulled apart, panting, they couldn't suppress the goofy smiles that made their way onto their faces.

"I'm in love with you too," Sirius smiled at him, "And it doesn't matter that you don't have a bloody paw print on your skin. You're still my soulmate, at least to me you are" Remus almost dropped him.

"W-what?"

"I don't need some stupid tattoo to tell me I'm destined to be with you."

"No, what did you say about your tattoo?"

"The paw print?" Sirius held up his wrist and showed it, "It's just some stupid ink," But Remus was crying. "Hey, Moony, it's alright" He reached forward and wiped off his eyes as his hands were still busy holding Sirius against the wall. Remus finally let Sirius down and took his own hands to his eyes to wipe the tears away.

"How could I have been so stupid?" Remus muttered.

"What are you on about?" Sirius was more concerned about Remus than he was about whatever Remus just discovered. "Are you okay?" Remus nodded.

"I'm better than I'll ever be."

"And why's that?"

"Cause Sirius Black is my soulmate." Remus held up his wrist to show a paw print that matched Sirius'. 

Sirius gasped and then reached out and grabbed Remus' wrist. Sirius was crying now too, but he didn't even notice. He kissed the mark and then looked back up at Remus. Sirius bit his lip and smiled.

"Moony's my soulmate," Sirius whispered, "Thank you" He looked at the stars and then turned to Remus again. And then, all of a sudden, two worlds collided as the boys crashed together again.

Sirius decided that this must be what it feels like to fall off the Astronomy Tower. It was like teasing death only to be thrown into the light. It was like standing under the stars and basking in the moonlight. It was like feeling every happy feeling in the entire world and completely forgetting that anything could go wrong. It was like being alive for the first time.

It was like having Remus Lupin as your soulmate.


End file.
